\\.::=Two=::.//

I walked into the funeral home trying to be as calm as possible. I was holding onto Jay, Justin’s best friend, and hold back tears. I cried so much over the past five days, I had the headache from hell. I got to the casket and look down at Justin. I couldn’t let go. I let go of Jay’s arm and smooth out Justin’s hair.
“Ooh, Justin,” I whispered, as my voice cracked. I started sobbing and held his cold hands. “Please, God, give him back. Please!” I cried. I laid my head on his chest and cried harder. “I love you, Justin. Please, come back.”
“Raina, come on, sweet heart,” Jay said rubbing my back.
“No, Jay! I don’t want to leave Justin!” I yelled, crying more.
“I know, sweetie,” he said stoking my hair.
Justin’s mom came up behind me and pulled me away from Justin. “Get the fuck off of me!” I yelled. “You didn’t even believe him that none of that was his fault!” I yelled at her. I never had a problem with Justin’s family; it was just that I was mad at everyone that couldn’t help Justin.
“Raina, it’s okay,” Jay said pulling me into a hug.
“Just leave me alone,” I said pushing him away. They walked away into another room as others came to pay their respects.
“So, how’s it going?” The voice gave me chills down my neck and made the hairs on my neck stand up. “You going to sulk your life away, dwelling over Justin? Well, you shouldn’t do that, sweet heart.”
“Kenny, shut the fuck up, you asshole!” I yelled.
“Just remember, there’s no proof me and Matt did it. And if you somehow find away, I’ll be sure that you’re joining Mister Justin Lane.”
“Kenny, I’ll kill you myself,” I said grabbing his shirt. I punched him in the face and the whole room’s attention turned to us. “And Justin will be more then proud of me for doing that,” I hissed. I kissed Justin’s forehead and whispered, “I love you,” and walked away.

A good hundred and some people were standing in the graveyard, and I sat under the tent by Justin’s coffin crying. Kenny didn’t even bother coming in. Jay stood by me trying to keep me calm. After the service was over, I still sat in the car as everyone left.
Jay didn’t rush me. He was Justin’s best friend, and he was trying to be strong for me. He didn’t want to cry and let me down, but he had his breaking moments. I knew it was time to leave, so I took a deep breath and stood up. Jay had to help me walk back to the car. I was such a mess, it was hard to walk.
We went to Justin’s favorite restaurant in Pittsburgh and I sat in the back with Justin’s close friends. Jay sat next to my left and Keith to my right. We tried not to get on the topic of Justin. And if we did, they made sure it was something really funny, so I wouldn’t break down.

That whole week, I didn’t go to school. I didn’t want to do anything or see anyone that was involved with killing Justin. The next Monday, I drug myself out of bed and got ready for school. My parents were very understanding and wanted me to take my time at getting over Justin.
I took a shower, brushed my teeth, and straightened my blonde hair. I put light make up on, jeans, flip flops, a random white tee shirt, and Justin’s hockey hoodie. I grabbed my purse and keys and headed out of my room. “Hey, mom,” I said giving her a hug.
“Good morning, Raina. Do you need a ride? Are you sure you want to go today?” she asked.
“I’m going to drive myself. But thanks.”
“You sure you want to go though?” she asked again.
“Yes, mom, I’m sure,” I said with a weak smile.
She smiled and kissed my check. “Have a good day, sweet heart. Call if you need anything!”
“Will do, mom!” I left the house and drove to school. It seemed everyone’s eyes were on me. It was so strange not hold Justin’s hand going to his locker, and having him walk me to mine. I almost turned right to go to his, but remembered mine was left. It was going to be very hard to get used to. Thankfully, there were only two weeks left. I couldn’t wait for it to be over.